by @taoellescat on twt
what are your pronouns?
1. they/them
2. she/her
3. he/him
4. she/they
5. he/they
6. any
7. xe/xem
8. ze/hir
9. other
is your name gender neutral?
1. no, masculine
2. no, feminine
3. yes
4. i go by multiple names
which one of these terms describes your attraction best?
1. lesbian
2. gay
3. bi
4. pan
5. aroace
6. straight
7. queer
8. trixic
9. toric
10. questioning
11. other
which terms do you prefer?
1. feminine
2. masculine
3. gender neutral
4. any
5. other
how would you say you present yourself?
1. fem
2. masc
3. androgynous
4. other
do you feel any connection with manhood and/or womanhood?
1. yes, manhood
2. yes, womanhood
3. yes, both (at the same time or not)
4. no
do you identify as non-binary?
1.yes
2.no
3.i don't know
nope!
seems like you're not non-binary!
yes!
congratulations! you're a very real and valid non-binary person. you don't owe anybody androgyny or they/them pronouns. your unique non-binary experience deserves to be respected and celebrated every day. you're phenomenal, lovable, amazing, perfect the way you are! have an amazing day!need validation?
it's ok to be confused. it might feel scary but it's 100% ok to not know who you are straight away. whatever you are, you are valid. take all the time you need to figure everything out, there's no rush. don't be afraid to experiment and try on different pronouns, labels or names — none of these things are irreversible, you can go back whenever you feel uncomfortable. remember that you're not alone, there are many people who feel the way you do. it's ok, it's natural. there's nothing wrong with you.
it's ok to ask for help! it's ok to need reassurance! it doesn't mean you're not valid or not non-binary enough. you are. nothing can change that. remember that you're not the only person struggling with accepting your non-binary identity. there are people who feel this way, too. you're never alone.
what's bothering you?
1. i identify as a lesbian/gay but i feel like i'm non-binary2. i feel disconnected from my agab because of my trauma3. i feel like i'm non-binary but i don't feel comfortable with they/them pronouns4. i enjoy presenting feminine/masculine5. i strongly align with a binary gender6. i'm scared of making a mistakerestart the test
i identify as a lesbian/gay but i think i'm non-binary.
being non-binary doesn't erase your sexuality! non-binary people are included in every sexuality and always have been. it's ok to have a complicated relationship with gender, your identity is complex and unique and it shouldn't be simplified for other people to "get" it. if identifying as a non-binary lesbian/gay makes you feel comfortable, if you feel like it describes you best, then do it! realizing you're non-binary doesn't mean you have to give up the comfort the lesbian/gay label and community give you!
my trauma affects my relationship with gender and i feel like i'm faking being non-binary.
you're not faking. you're not "making the community look bad", you're not being overdramatic or harmful. feeling disconnected from your assigned gender at birth because of your trauma is ok, it's valid, nobody should police your traumatic experience/reaction to a traumatic event. it also in no way means your trauma defines you in any way. it is a part of you, it's a part of your unique experience, it's up to you how to deal with it. identifying as non-binary because of your trauma is ok and valid.
i want to use the non-binary label but i don't feel comfortable with they/them pronouns.
and that's ok! you don't have to use they/them pronouns to be non-binary! whatever the reason why you feel this way is, it's valid, you are, your pronouns are. use whatever pronouns you're comfortable with. non-binary is not about being the third gender, it's about existing out of binary. there's no wrong way to be non-binary.
i prefer presenting feminine/masculine but i feel like i should "try to pass".
gender identity doesn't equal gender expression! you can look however you want and still be non-binary! it's never your fault that people assume your gender based on how you look. you don't need to deny yourself comfort to present the way people expect you to.
i feel a strong connection with a binary gender.
your alignment doesn't make you any less non-binary. using binary pronouns or gendered terms, names doesn't make you less non-binary. non-binary is a spectrum, there's more to being non-binary than just being genderless/unaligned. you're non-binary enough the way you are.
i want to try identifying as non-binary but i'm scared it won't fit.
if the term non-binary won't fit you, it's ok. it's ok to try terms or pronouns out and it's ok to learn new things about yourself, your identity. you'll never know what terms and pronouns you're comfortable with if you won't try them out. there's nothing wrong with experimenting and even if you change your label afterwards, it's ok, there's nothing wrong with that. you're not the reason why the non-binary community is not taken seriously, transphobia is. you're not accountable for it.